Friday, June 06, 2008
Rosie O'Donnell & Me
We watch Gray's Anatomy, or at least we did. I don't know about next year. Really, Meredith and McDreamy are never going to get together, until the final year right before the show goes off the air, and I can jump back on the bandwagon then. We're switching to The Office this fall because not only is Michael a complete hoot, I've read that sitcoms are good for your health!

In Gray's Anatomy, Meredith has begun counseling. She started right before I did, although that's not completely true, she began it four shows before this season's finale, but we're a bit behind at our house. Knowing I had my own appointment on the couch, I was curious what happened behind that door. Meredith's therapist has thin lips and should have worn more moisturizer when she was a younger lass, her look is a bit hard, and she sometimes downright badgers Meredith into answers, with both of them screaming at each other! Since I've worked at a counseling office and never heard much screaming there, I trusted it was screenwriting to get ratings, rather than based on real life stuff. So I kept the appointment.

I walked down the stairs, and saw Joann through the open door, an attractive woman about my age, dressed professionally enough to make me think she knows what she's doing, and casual enough to set me at ease. No thin lips or pinched look. She didn't look like a screamer. The office had a few seating choices, gathered around each other in a circle. She told me to take my pick. It seemed hoggish to grab the blue velvety settee, but next time I might - it looked the most comfy with room to curl your legs up under you.

She's a professional listener, the really great kind, the kind that listens, never, ever interrupts, and feeds back to you what you're saying, with pointed questions as needed. I could go to counseling just to learn to listen like she does!

Being there did not feel awkward at all, like first-time things have a tendency to do. I'm thinking back to my first kiss by Tommy Bacon, who had freckles, a flat-top haircut, and lived on the corner, my first dance at a slumber party held in my girlfriend's basement and we'd snuck in boys. Neil Diamond's 'Sweet Caroline" played while we shuffled around, and I wore a pink, one-piece, slinky pajama get-up. I got grounded six months for that little outing.

At the end of our session together I told her that I'd seen Rosie O'Donnell years ago, and decided we had one thing in common, in spite of the fact that I cannot stand her, and that goes back before she became completely obnoxious and popped out of the closet. Rosie said, 'with me the cycle stops.' She was referring to whatever unhealthy cycles had been in her family line for years and years. I don't remember the specifics of what she was referring to. I just knew it would become a mantra for me. The cycle of failed marriages, kids who didn't go to college, substance abuses, low self-esteem, having too many days left after the paycheck was long used up, family who lived too far apart and struggled to keep connected, those cycles. My family tree could have worse cycles that affected me. I'm thankful for the nurturing while I was growing up that gave me the wherewithall to hope for something better in my own life. That doesn't happen by accident, but rather by God's grace and at least a few people watching out for you.

I told Joann I thought it funny Rosie decided 'the cycle stops here' with her, then came out of the closet, 'married' a partner of the same sex, and began to raise children with them. It seemed a strange way to stop a cycle. Rosie and I don't have a lot in common but we do share that one driving desire.

Maybe, just maybe, we all have something in common with those we think are the least like us?

She laughed, we laughed. It was a good way to end the first time together.


  posted at 8:20 AM

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